Beneath It All
by ChocoPrep
Summary: Because beneath it all, I knew this couldn't be it, it couldn't be the end. Beneath it all hid a whole other story. He'd already walked away with a "goodbye", but he'd also left me some clues. And there was no way I was letting this be without a fight.
1. This Is It

**Disclaimer: The Gallagher Girls series belongs to Ally Carter.**

**AN: Okay, this might not be so great. Please don't be too harsh. It's my first GG-fic.**

"How _could_ you?" I whispered, staring directly into his face. But there was nothing romantic about it. In fact, a part of me was just itching to punch him up the nose.

He stared right back at me, his expression mixed. It contained coldness, ignominy, regret…and _fear_. But no matter how covert he was, he couldn't hide it. And no matter how bad he felt, it didn't change what had happened—what was _still_ happening!

The teenage boy standing in front of me was still tall, dark, and mysteriously full of secrets. But I no longer wanted to uncover those secrets. I didn't care if he saw the tear disgracefully rolling down my face as I managed to choke out. "I thought I could trust you."

His voice daringly barged in. "Did you, Cammie?" The stale space between us narrowed. Did he really just say that? I managed and tried to keep a cover of shock and truthfulness on my face. "Of course I did."

He chuckled—in this situation, he CHUCKLED—and replied. "Who's lying now?"

I broke the fierce ogle and focused on the floor. Another tear landed on the cold stone tiles. "You didn't just lie to me, Zach. You _deceived _me." He pointed to himself, not smiling anymore and said. "Spy."

I gritted my teeth and swung my fist into his arm, stopping it from reaching his detached face just in time without apology. That was only a fraction of the betrayal I felt. My eyes spilled more saltwater. I tried to hit him again, but this time was different. He caught my wrist and pulled me so that our toes were just touching.

"Do you want me dead or something?" I wanted to know. "Is there something that we—or something that _I_ did?"

Zach's voice cracked. "Why the _hell _do you think it had _anything_ to do with you? It's my own freaking fault and I'm trying not to pull you down. You think I _meant_ for it happen like that that day?!" He looked at me, his eyes clouding with disbelief.

I sucked in a breath; I suddenly had a desperate need for air. My chest felt tight. His hand moved from my wrist to the crook of my elbow. "I didn't, Cammie. All I ever wanted to do was protect you, but you just can't change who you _are_."

My voice sounded weird. "If you tried hard enough—if there was someone to help you, there's always a way."

His eyes slowly moved up from the ground to my legs, omitting civilly over my chest, to the fresh-scar on my cheek. I swear I almost saw a half-smile, but he seemed to swallow it. "Are you saying you forgive me?"

I quickly auto-responded. "Definitely not. If you think this makes everything all damn better—"

He interrupted and pulled me even closer so that our noses touched. "Good." And one moment the only thing that we were really holding together were our mingled breaths. The next, our lips decided to get involved.

His descended on mine first. I wasn't the one to kiss him, right? Although I _did_ notice that he kind of smelled _really_ good when we got really close. But that wasn't the point, the point was that his lips were pressing firmly around mine as his arms slid around my back…and that I was doing the same right back.

It just felt so good, even though everything—the timing, the emotions, the moment—was all so wrong. His warm lips captured me in a way I hadn't felt in a long time. Not since that long dip in the hallway last year. But even though everything had been all solved and nice last time, it didn't even _compare_ to now.

There truly was no time like the present. And there truly was no other time to break free and slap him. Oops. Did I actually do that? His breathing was going up and down like we'd just had two P&E sessions.

I was too afraid to look him in the eye. My body was still pressed against his. "What the hell are you doing, Zach?"

He grinned foolishly. I doubt he even felt the slap. Maybe I should have used the electro-hammer Liz gave me. Yeah. That probably would've gotten through. He answered, his tone suggesting it was obvious. "Kissing you."

I pulled away before he could lean down again. Because then it would take way too long for me to bear to break it. "Not on my watch."

"Too late."

"Shut up!"

"Can I just say one thing?"

"No, not really."

He ignored me. "I'm really sorry for this. For everything. This wasn't supposed to be this complicated." His facade grew somber. "So I know how to make it simple, the way it was meant to be."

_What are you talking about?_ I was too stunned to do anything but mouth the words. He nodded to show me he read my expression and my lips. He slowly backed out. "Bye, Cammie." He turned and started to walk away. My feet felt like hard unmovable plaster.

I called softly. "Is this the last time I'm going to see you?" A strong wave of déjà vu hit me as the words flew from my mouth. But instead of following it, he contrasted without skipping a beat. "I sure hope so."

The words blew the foundation from under my legs. The blue-gray tiles felt like they were going to rush up and slap me in the face; I honestly couldn't breathe. It wasn't like in Washington D.C when I'd broken almost all my ribs, this time it was the part that hid _behind_ my rib cage that had been shredded to pieces within five words.

This couldn't be anything except for the end of the chapter of this story. But there wasn't any fucking happily ever after. I collapsed to my knees as I heard a familiar voice cry. "Cammie!"

The world slowly paled then burst into nothing but pure black. But just before the darkness hit, I knew one thing. This was far from over.

**AN: Thoughts? This is based after ****DJAGBHC**** and on the summary of ****OTGSY****. Please review! Hopefully I can get at least one before continuing. Thanks!**

**ILY,**

**~Chocó prep a.k.a KLU**


	2. You Can Run

**Disclaimer: Ally Carter Has Ownership Of The Series—a.k.a A-CHOOTS. But I own that term XD**

**AN: Thanks for the awesome support! I honestly couldn't believe it at first, when I got over five reviews! I was crossing my fingers for **_**please, just let me get at least **__**one**__**!**_** So I'm happy that my first GG hasn't turned out to be a complete nosedive…yeah, I talk way too much. Oh, and this chapter is dedicated to **_**Kelsey Goode**_**.**

Liz looked over me warily. "Cammie?"

I closed my right eye, my left, and then blinked both. Our sign for _I'm not unconscious_. Liz sighed. "Why do we even have that sign? I mean, if you're conscious, the person could just say so."

"Unless you pretend to have gotten knocked out in a fight and the other person is still up and needs to know."

Liz nodded. "Point. So are you going to tell me—"

"—why the _hell_ Liz started screaming because she found you almost blue on the floor?" Bex yelled as she barged in. I opened my mouth to explain, but Macey headed into the room first. She replied coolly. "I can think of one reason." She flipped her hair. "And it starts with the omega of the alphabet."

I looked at the ground. "Zach." Liz sighed. "Oh, Cammie." She patted me on the back.

I squirmed away. "Mother me much?" She looked slightly taken aback. Bex coughed. "Nice way to treat someone who's been watching you for 26 hours, 39 minutes, and 19 seconds straight." She mumbled under her breath. "_20, 21, 22, 23…_"

Macey rolled her eyes. "So are you going to tell us what happened?" Goodness. Seems like they were just waiting for me to get up for the gossip.

Liz looked genuinely hurt. "Of course not. We're your best friends—we _care_ about you."

Oops. Must've said that aloud. "It was nothing. I just had a hard time saying bye to Zach 'cause you know, I might not see him again. And bad sushi. So I…fell?"

There was silence until Bex replied, her accent fresh and polished. Or was that just me, since I hadn't heard it in 26 hours, 39 minutes, and 19 seconds? _20, 21, 22, 23…_ "You want to grab some breakfast? I'm totally for some fish and chi—fries."

Macey added. "That is, if Cammie can think straight enough to walk." She snapped her fingers. "Wait! She never thinks at all!" She smiled to let me know she was joking. I attempted a smile back in response. Probably came out like an old-lady grimace from a grocery store when a kid knocks over a random cabbage in front of her.

I should know. But don't ask.

Macey and Bex left the room, arguing over which would more painful: Getting out of a shark-filled tank with your hands tied and a blindfold or swimming backwards from a dozen barracudas wearing a gold-glitter bikini and gold ear piercings.** (Barracudas: easily attracted to prey and **_**intensely **_**attracted to**__**bright colors and shimmers.)**

Liz said. "I know my parents aren't kick-ass agents, but they still had some pretty good advice. They said when something like this happens,"

I looked out the window, focusing on a dull green branch that looked like it was about to break off. "Yeah, I know. Just forget it, don't think about it, move on, etcetera." _Don't cry, _ I chanted to myself, _don't cry, don't cry._

Liz shook her head. "No. That if it—or _he_, in this case—meant a lot to you, get to the bottom of it. Don't you _dare_ let it go." She told me fiercely.

Whoa. What had happened while I went as conscious as a rock? "That sounds smart." I nodded, not really thinking of taking it. I mean, how could I? It sounded easier than it really was. Because there was one huge marauder stopping me. It was called Pain. Pain, that came from betrayal, mistrust, the old being "used 'n' abused", and as much as I hated to admit it, especially now, he'd never loved me. Might not even have _liked _me.

And I did. But then there stood another puzzling question: Why did he kiss me? Like that? And he hadn't even been the one to break away!

Another pang smashed into my chest at the thought of our kiss. Of us.

Sitting at the lunch table now, only one answer came to me. It had been pity. Pity for me, my tears. Pity. That's all it came down to. Another little part of me died.

Bex settled her tray next to me and deliberated me. I must look like crap. She said, "You look like," I waited. She finished gently. "someone who got hurt. Really hurt."

I felt tears rise into my eyes. No, I couldn't let Bex see me cry. Bex looked hard at me. "And I don't mean just physically, Cammie."

Macey opened her "magazine" and joined the conversation, her voice dripping evident sympathy. "She's hurt because she has a broken heart."

"State the obvious." The words barely passed through my lips. _Don't cry, don't cry! Come on! He's just a stupid little jerk._

Macey spooned some mousse into her glossy mouth. "That's what happens when a freak that had no right to enter your life does. And then you like that piece of trash."

"Shut up." I hissed at her. Macey looked stricken and dimly offended. She responded coolly. "Okay, Cammie."

Bex mumbled. "Cam has a point. You talk _way_ too much. But then again, you've never had a best friend to comfort or work out you issues with." She said the last part so softly I almost didn't catch it.

Liz snapped. "Guess who else has those problems?"

I pushed my tray roughly away and held my hands up. "Look guys, why don't we all just drop it and shut up?" I said, uncertain to my real feelings but managing to sound certain to my own ears. "I don't care; I'll get over it soon enough."

I swallowed and forced the final words. "Because really, Zach was just another guy that I never really loved."

Bex looked skeptical but then seemed to accept it. "Okay. If you say he's just another Josh, fine."

Um, how did Josh get into this? Do I need another (faux-confident) speech?

Macey shrugged, her way of saying that she agreed with Bex. Liz looked perplexed and didn't say anything to me. She stood. "I'm going to head over to the library to study for extra credit."

Mr. Smith huffed his way over to us, his shoulders releasing the tension when he noticed me. "Cameron, your mother,"

I immediately got up, my knee bouncing against the table top. Owie! "Something's wrong?"

He looked calm enough. "Of course not, Cameron. She said she just wanted to see you, that's all." I was feeling relieved until he said. "Though I believe it might have something to do with your _episode_ this week, what with your face becoming so au fait with the floor."

My face colored. Trina, who had been sitting a couple of seats away, snorted her drink out her nose. So graceful, so lady-like. Not.

Mr. Smith's forehead creased. "Now, Cammie. Please don't wind up her mood; you know how it is these days."

I nodded. Ever since the incident, she'd been a little out of it and bent out. Definitely not the same secure, self-assured woman I'd known for my whole life. I raced to her room. "Mom?"

She stared at me; her eyes were wide open in fear. "Where are they?"

I sighed. So she was in mode Paranoid Confusion. "No one's coming, Mom."

"They already came?!" She yelled. "We have to call a code red!"

I immediately started rubbing circles on her back to relieve her sudden burst of stress. I felt like a therapist. Or like in the last month we'd somehow switched places; I was a tired mom and she was a little sixth grader. "No, no, it's okay now. They've left," I made sure to say, even though I had no idea who "they" were.

"No," She moaned, shaking her head. "They filtered our ranks, they broke it."

"Broke what? Nothing's broken. Gillian's sword is fine." I answered, not sure what in the world she was thinking of. "Broke what?" I asked again.

"Our trust." She whispered. And just like that, she was asleep. I felt tears in my eyes. There was _no_ way they could just do this to her and not get something a thousand times' worse back at them. There was no way they—_he_—could just do this to her.

I went back to our dorm and crawled onto my bed. Bex flopped onto the nearest bed, her stomach snuggling against the relaxing comforter. "How was she?" She asked quietly, undoing the corner threads with her pinky and ring finger as we'd learned in **F**ighting **A**nd **C**rime **S**ciences.

I mumbled. "The usual."

"For now." Bex insisted. I loved her positive certainty at moments like this. "Well, mate," She rolled onto her back. "I'm dead tired from all this drama so I'm going to get some extra rest." Yeah, ever since, Bex had been taking _naps_, like Liz. Bex, the one who was always eager to get some action. She wanted to _sleep_.

I listened to her breathing grow into light snores. Then, I walked out, totally unprepared for the next message that met my ears.

"I know, Cammie. You can't hide it from me, I know what happened."

**AN: Hey! I tried to finish this as soon as possible. But this might not be my first priority; ****My Time Will Come**** is another story that's really important to me. So I'm trying to balance both. Yes, I am tremendously stupid for creating another story while I'm still working hard on another.**

**~Chocó prep a.k.a KLU**


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